#IslandProblems

Today is a rainy day, boohoo. This means I can’t chill by my pool and read while Byron is off at work. Which leads me to what this blog is about: Island Problems. These are the many “problems” that come along with living in paradise. Guy it isn’t all fun and games here! 

1. Sand... It’s everywhere. On your feet, in the shower, in the car, in your shoes, and god forbid it’s in the bed!

What complaining sounds like: “These clear blue waters and white sandy beaches suck! I have sand ALL over my car now from one trip to the beach that's only 5 minutes away from my house. Life sucks!” #IslandProblems

2.It’s sticky! I wake up, I’m sticky, I take a shower and get out, still sticky and I go to town with my hair down, my hair is sticking to my forehead and arms because... I’m sticky. I mean hold up for a moment, if I were in Michigan right now I’d be so dry that my skin would crack and bleed! But Damn it, where’s the blood? My hands are as soft as a babies butt! 

What complaining sounds like: “Man, even though I just showered off after the beach, I’m still sticky! Now I need to put my hair up.” #IslandProblems

3. Sunscreen all the time! I mean, during the summer in good ol Michigan I wear sunscreen when I go to the beach, but here, I need to wear it even if I’m going to buy groceries! The sun is so much more intense here and for me being blond haired and blue eyed with a patch on my stomach that doesn’t tan at all, I need to Layer that stuff on! I mean I think about the sun here and get sun burnt!

What complaining sounds like: “Dude! It takes so long to put this stupid sun screen on, I just want to leave the house now so we can spend more time in town enjoying this beautiful day! UGH” #IslandProblems

4. “These iguanas are EVERYWHERE!” AT first, every time I spotted one I would announce it, but now it’s old news. Once you start driving too, you need to watch out for these things. They are like squirrels except much more uncoordinated and a lot... slowweerrrr. A squirrel back at home runs across the road and you get frustrated because you almost killed the poor guy, but a fricken iguana lingers slowly across the road you have to stop and wait, and then a huge line of traffic piles up behind you. Also, if you come near the things, beware of their tails, they will whip you.

What complaining sounds like: “Sorry everyone! I’m calling because I’m going to be late for the restaurant! I’m stuck behind a damn iguana. Just order now guys.”

5. Driving up and down the mountains! I’m lucky enough to not drive, but poor Byron learned stick shift on the island. If you’re not going up, you’re going down, and if you happen to be on flat land, you’re stuck in traffic down in town and sweating your butt off in the car. The roads are also narrow and “any stop sign with a white ring around it is optional”. That's what a friend of ours told me. (“Hey, I thought every stop sign had a white ring around it?” You’re right mister.) Imagine doing this also on the opposite side of the street. You’re driving on the left side, in an American car. 

What complaining sounds like: Looks at passenger in car, “Hey do you see anyone coming up the hill, I don’t wanna stop! Do you see anyone? Huh?” Passenger pulls their head forward and yells “it’s not clear! You can’t make it!” Driver is sad he has to wait. #IslandProblems

6. Everything is expensive! Everything is shipped here, so it costs more. I’m lucky enough where I can’t drink milk and soy milk is much cheaper! And gas... oh you guys sure do like to complain in the states about “pain at the pump” but guess what? We have it worse. Put that one in your juice box and suck it.

What complaining sounds like: “Dang it! I’m almost on E, but I bet we can still make it to the beach without filling up. Let’s hope I don’t make a wrong turn or we are screwed!” #IslandProblems

7. “I saw this last week in the store, where is it now?” Guess what sucker, things are always changing here! Get it while you can! They ship what they can, do you see any factories on this Island? Didn’t think so.

What complaining sounds like: “Aww last week I bought these awesome bagels and ate them all, and now they don’t have them in stock! I guess I’ll get these bagels then. This sucks.” #IslandProblems

8. Saying the wrong greeting! I’ve mentioned this once before, but you need to say either “good morning”, “good afternoon”, “good evening” and “good night” to everyone walking into a public setting and make sure that it is the right time of day. Something you’re not used to unless your a hyper child with parents that never told you not to talk to strangers. Here, everyone is a kid with no parental guidance, “I’m not sure who you are, but good morning person walking down the street!” They don’t care if you’re an ax murder with a bloody chair saw, or a drunk homeless man, you better say something back to them or they will give you dirtier looks than a if you were a green pig walking into a bar filled with angry birds! 

What complaining sounds like: “Man I look like such an ass, I just said good morning when it’s 12:01pm and they corrected me and wont stop giving me dirty looks. We should just find another gas station.”  #IslandProblems

9. Don’t drink that water! Tap water here is for washing your hands, and going potty in. You can boil it and make it cooking water or brush your teeth in it, but don’t you dare drink the stuff. Every trip to the store you either have to get a few more gallons of water, or you can go get them refilled. It takes awhile getting used to, I can tell you that, for someone who is against using bottled water. 

What complaining sounds like: “I’m so thirsty right now! I left my stupid water bottle in the car too. I wish I could just drink out of the sink right in front of me.” #IslandProblems

10. I can’t decide which beach to go to. You’d be surprised how many beaches there are here and there is a law that states that no one can privately own beach property. Anyone can go anywhere as long as it’s beach. The problem with this is that you have so many choices! The island is only so big and is surrounded with only the most awesome beaches you’ve ever seen. Where I’m from, we had one beach and it was called South Haven, and you could pick either north or south beach. Dark waters, cold, and if it was a good day, very, very crowded. Here, there are beaches where tourist take over the white sandy beaches with their farmer’s tanned bodies and Hawaiian print bathing suits, all the way to beaches that are secluded and out of the way and even on a really nice day, you might run into about 5 people sharing the beach with you, doing their own thing. With this, also comes making a decision. There’s times where you sit with your friends for 30 minutes trying to make the right choice and wasting your precious sun bathing and swimming time. Yeah, rough, I know!

What complaining sounds like: “I don’t know where to go this afternoon with my friends! I mean, do I want to snorkel more and see some really sweet fish? Or do I want a really awesome spot where I can hang out with my friends in peace? Ahh or do I want to swim in waters that are so clear I can see the bottom the whole time I’m swimming? I don’t know man, this is too hard.” #IslandProblems

So I could go on and on, but I’m going to stop there. As you can see, it’s not all fun and games here. I have endured some hard times and managed to make it out just fine, I’m not sure how though. 

Keep on reading our posts! We have much more where this came from, I swear!